I know this is probably cliche since today is Thanksgiving, but I still think it's necessary. It's important to realize what you're thankful for as things could always be worse. So I am thankful for:
:: my amazing family
:: my adoring husband
:: my health
:: having the financial stability to live the lifestyle I want to live and to celebrate my husband's 30th birthday in style
:: wonderful friends who are constantly looking out for me
:: a roof over my head and food on the table
:: a job with benefits
I do have to say that although I'm thankful for the things I have in my life, I really miss my mom. This was our first Thanksgiving without her and we did the best we could without her amazing cooking (especially her gravy), but it was definitely not the same without her. I love you, mom.
Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Monday, October 10, 2011
Light the Night Walk
I need your help! My dad, Matt and I are walking in this year's Light the Night Walk, a fundraising event for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. I don't have to tell you how much this means to me, but I want to take every opportunity to raise money in hopes that families can be spared the pain I have felt in the last two years. Please donate if you can and spread the news to everyone in your contacts list.
You can visit our team page here: http://pages.lightthenight.org/sf/EastBay11/DiannaMoran Next year I promise to begin fundraising earlier, but the walk this year is October 22nd so please donate soon, donate often! THANK YOU!!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Happy Birthday, Mom!
I don't ever want to believe
I don't ever want to believe, yeah
That when we die
That we all leave
I don't ever want to let go
I hope that you see, yeah
That there's a part of you that's left inside of me
-All American Rejects, "Believe"
I can't believe it's already been 5 months... I miss you more and more each day and I still don't know what I'm doing without you by my side. I'm so sorry you had to go so soon :( Love you lots and lots. Happy birthday, Mom!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Rough Day
Today I attended a very sad funeral. I really don't want to disclose who it was for on the web, as it is not my news to tell, but I wanted to write down how I feel about it before the moment passes.
The person who recently passed was not someone I knew very well. I knew his wife and I have gotten to know his sweet little child. Though the time I spent with him was very very short, I got to see a glimpse of the person he was. He was an amazing father and an avid sports fan, and he will certainly be very very missed. I did ok during the funeral, and then at the burial until it came time for his daughter to say goodbye. The little kid wave just about shredded my heart. She's old enough to know he's gone, but not old enough to know what kind of impact that will have on her life.
I have attended only two true funerals in my life prior to the one today. The first was during high school for a friend of mine who was killed in a car accident. The church was so full with family and friends that I, among a lot of my high school class, had to sit in the hallway crying on my boyfriend's (at the time) shoulder. The wails from his mom were almost too much to handle. The second was for my grandpa - my mom's dad. He had a beautiful catholic mass followed by a reception where I got to meet some extended family and some of our family friends whom I had never met and he was in his 70s and had lived a good life. I still think he passed too early, but he had had the chance to see his children grow up, marry, and have children of their own. With my mother being so sick I often get worried that she won't be around to see the kids I plan on having and I really hate having these thoughts. Though I certainly had those thoughts today.
I'm so grateful that I was able to attend the funeral today to show my support for the family during this very difficult time. This man died far too early and based on the amount of people who came to show their respects, he was certainly loved by many. May he rest in peace.
The person who recently passed was not someone I knew very well. I knew his wife and I have gotten to know his sweet little child. Though the time I spent with him was very very short, I got to see a glimpse of the person he was. He was an amazing father and an avid sports fan, and he will certainly be very very missed. I did ok during the funeral, and then at the burial until it came time for his daughter to say goodbye. The little kid wave just about shredded my heart. She's old enough to know he's gone, but not old enough to know what kind of impact that will have on her life.
I have attended only two true funerals in my life prior to the one today. The first was during high school for a friend of mine who was killed in a car accident. The church was so full with family and friends that I, among a lot of my high school class, had to sit in the hallway crying on my boyfriend's (at the time) shoulder. The wails from his mom were almost too much to handle. The second was for my grandpa - my mom's dad. He had a beautiful catholic mass followed by a reception where I got to meet some extended family and some of our family friends whom I had never met and he was in his 70s and had lived a good life. I still think he passed too early, but he had had the chance to see his children grow up, marry, and have children of their own. With my mother being so sick I often get worried that she won't be around to see the kids I plan on having and I really hate having these thoughts. Though I certainly had those thoughts today.
I'm so grateful that I was able to attend the funeral today to show my support for the family during this very difficult time. This man died far too early and based on the amount of people who came to show their respects, he was certainly loved by many. May he rest in peace.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
White and Nerdy
Have you listened to that Weird Al song? You should. It was my brother's ring tone until I got a new phone.
Anyway, most of the people in my family have had to get glasses pretty late in life and I always figured I would be 40-something before it would happen to me. Of course, I didn't factor in the fact that I stare at a computer screen for 9 hours a day and then go home and... stare at a computer or TV screen. Clearly this is not good for my eyes. I got reading glasses early in college because late night studying my biology textbooks made me super tired, but they're old and weren't working anymore. Plus they're ugly. Talk about embarrassing.
So I called a friend's optometrist who never returned my call. That's the second time that's happened to me this year already, wtf people? Either answer your phone or call me back - especially when I leave a nice clear message with my name and phone number repeated several times.
*end rant*
Anyway, most of the people I work with wear glasses either part time (just for reading/computer work) or full time so I figured I was safe. I got another referral to a place that's right across the street from my regular doctor. EASY. So I go down there and it turns out the lady I was referred to lives in Dublin. Holy freaking awesome. So we chat as we do a million (not kidding) eye exams and she wisks me away to the next room where a lady helps me pick out a pair of stylish new glasses, then that lady wisks me away to "the finance department" which is a tiny cubicle where I can pay my bill for the day, then my doctor swings by and gets me for the last part of the test. That was amazing. And efficient. And amazing. LOVE LOVE LOVE.
Oh, and she dilated my eyes because I had time and Matt could pick me up afterward. I should have taken a picture, my eyes were freaky. Think Wes from Limp Bizkit.
So, I'll have a check up in two years and another dilation in four years, neither of which were bad at all. I also can't wait to get my glasses. The eye drops my doctor gave me are definitely helping, but they're not solving the problem.
I didn't mention - apparently when I blink my eyes don't close all the way. So I have to be very aware of how I blink throughout the day. Talk about exhausting. So the eye drops help my eyes stay moist since I don't always blink well enough. The glasses will prevent my eyes from tiring out so quickly. That's the source of my headaches and most of my discomfort.
Anyway, wanna see the new specs?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I know, right? Those frames are purple. And pink. PURPLE AND PINK. I'm one of the least girly girls on the planet and these are quite possibly my two least favorite colors. What's funny is they looked the best on me! We'll see if I feel that way once I get them. Wish me luck!
Anyway, most of the people in my family have had to get glasses pretty late in life and I always figured I would be 40-something before it would happen to me. Of course, I didn't factor in the fact that I stare at a computer screen for 9 hours a day and then go home and... stare at a computer or TV screen. Clearly this is not good for my eyes. I got reading glasses early in college because late night studying my biology textbooks made me super tired, but they're old and weren't working anymore. Plus they're ugly. Talk about embarrassing.
So I called a friend's optometrist who never returned my call. That's the second time that's happened to me this year already, wtf people? Either answer your phone or call me back - especially when I leave a nice clear message with my name and phone number repeated several times.
*end rant*
Anyway, most of the people I work with wear glasses either part time (just for reading/computer work) or full time so I figured I was safe. I got another referral to a place that's right across the street from my regular doctor. EASY. So I go down there and it turns out the lady I was referred to lives in Dublin. Holy freaking awesome. So we chat as we do a million (not kidding) eye exams and she wisks me away to the next room where a lady helps me pick out a pair of stylish new glasses, then that lady wisks me away to "the finance department" which is a tiny cubicle where I can pay my bill for the day, then my doctor swings by and gets me for the last part of the test. That was amazing. And efficient. And amazing. LOVE LOVE LOVE.
Oh, and she dilated my eyes because I had time and Matt could pick me up afterward. I should have taken a picture, my eyes were freaky. Think Wes from Limp Bizkit.
So, I'll have a check up in two years and another dilation in four years, neither of which were bad at all. I also can't wait to get my glasses. The eye drops my doctor gave me are definitely helping, but they're not solving the problem.
I didn't mention - apparently when I blink my eyes don't close all the way. So I have to be very aware of how I blink throughout the day. Talk about exhausting. So the eye drops help my eyes stay moist since I don't always blink well enough. The glasses will prevent my eyes from tiring out so quickly. That's the source of my headaches and most of my discomfort.
Anyway, wanna see the new specs?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I know, right? Those frames are purple. And pink. PURPLE AND PINK. I'm one of the least girly girls on the planet and these are quite possibly my two least favorite colors. What's funny is they looked the best on me! We'll see if I feel that way once I get them. Wish me luck!
Monday, March 21, 2011
Random Monday
I'm not sure today could have had more random things happen!
1. I got a message on Twitter from one of my mom's old friends. She was wondering how mom was doing since mom hasn't been feeling well enough to respond to emails/texts/etc. Thankfully I sort of recognized the name, but still weird none the less. Especially since I think she created the Twitter account so she could contact me, no other reason.
2. I got mooned today. I don't think I had ever actually seen someone moon me unless it was on TV or some stupid movie (this is why I don't watch these kinds of movies). Nope, just walking across campus and someone lifts up this girl's sweatshirt and apparently she didn't think to wear pants or underwear today. True story.
3. I saw a stray dog on campus and kind of got laughed at when I called Public Safety. Yes, I think she looks friendly but she wouldn't come my way and she has a collar on. Don't you think you should pick her up and get her home instead of letting her die on our campus? Thank you.
4. It was sunny this morning. And then cloudy. And then sunny. And then cloudy with HAIL! And then rain. And then some sun. Then some more rain. Mother Nature is confused and indecisive today.
5. *insert big thing that I can't mention online* but I promise it was random.
6. Matt is home sick while I sit here at work. Usually it's the other way around.
7. I got an email from Amazon saying my book shipped. Followed by another email that said while the status is technically "shipped", the book may be delayed a few days due to severe weather. Don't think I've ever gotten that email before.
8. Oh and apparently we're under a tornado warning? Good to know.
9. My Mr. Coffee mug warmer that Matt bought me ages ago works awesome.
10. #9 isn't really random, but I wanted 10 items haha.
1. I got a message on Twitter from one of my mom's old friends. She was wondering how mom was doing since mom hasn't been feeling well enough to respond to emails/texts/etc. Thankfully I sort of recognized the name, but still weird none the less. Especially since I think she created the Twitter account so she could contact me, no other reason.
2. I got mooned today. I don't think I had ever actually seen someone moon me unless it was on TV or some stupid movie (this is why I don't watch these kinds of movies). Nope, just walking across campus and someone lifts up this girl's sweatshirt and apparently she didn't think to wear pants or underwear today. True story.
3. I saw a stray dog on campus and kind of got laughed at when I called Public Safety. Yes, I think she looks friendly but she wouldn't come my way and she has a collar on. Don't you think you should pick her up and get her home instead of letting her die on our campus? Thank you.
4. It was sunny this morning. And then cloudy. And then sunny. And then cloudy with HAIL! And then rain. And then some sun. Then some more rain. Mother Nature is confused and indecisive today.
5. *insert big thing that I can't mention online* but I promise it was random.
6. Matt is home sick while I sit here at work. Usually it's the other way around.
7. I got an email from Amazon saying my book shipped. Followed by another email that said while the status is technically "shipped", the book may be delayed a few days due to severe weather. Don't think I've ever gotten that email before.
8. Oh and apparently we're under a tornado warning? Good to know.
9. My Mr. Coffee mug warmer that Matt bought me ages ago works awesome.
10. #9 isn't really random, but I wanted 10 items haha.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Insert cuss word here
Warning: I have a feeling this post won't be very mature or coherent, I just need to vent.
WHY?!
Why the hell have I gotten sick three times in the last 6 months? I started walking last fall so I've started to take better care of myself, I got my freaking flu shot two years in a row, and we got a dishwasher so we make sure all of our dishes are clean and free of germs. Could it be the stress? All the freaking stress?? Ugh my mom being sick and a few other things have really gotten me down over the last year, but is that really the only cause?
My mom got news last week that her leukemia was spreading quickly again. This means that the chemo worked, but not for long, and she'd have to get back on chemo as soon as possible. I knew she would be starting another round soon, so I'm not entirely sure why it was such a panic other than the leukemia was spreading (isn't it always spreading though? I don't know why this round was different...). Anyway, they told her she would have to do out-patient chemo with a different drug (one that she has done in-patient before) starting last Thursday I believe. But then she got a call that she had to go to the hospital to get a brand new chemo drug (don't know if it's brand new to the world, but its one that she hasn't gotten before) to see if it can get rid of the leukemia long enough to get her transplant. I'm not sure of the time line at the moment, but she did go back to the hospital today.
Please, please, please, keep her in your thoughts. Please?
Anyway, I stayed home from work today and slept and took pills and drank water and tea like crazy. I planned on going back to work tomorrow but it'll depend on the level of pain in my head and throat. I'm sure I caught this crap because my coworkers find it necessary to go to work sick to prove their loyalty or something and I just don't see it that way. STAY HOME WHEN YOU ARE SICK.
WHY?!
Why the hell have I gotten sick three times in the last 6 months? I started walking last fall so I've started to take better care of myself, I got my freaking flu shot two years in a row, and we got a dishwasher so we make sure all of our dishes are clean and free of germs. Could it be the stress? All the freaking stress?? Ugh my mom being sick and a few other things have really gotten me down over the last year, but is that really the only cause?
My mom got news last week that her leukemia was spreading quickly again. This means that the chemo worked, but not for long, and she'd have to get back on chemo as soon as possible. I knew she would be starting another round soon, so I'm not entirely sure why it was such a panic other than the leukemia was spreading (isn't it always spreading though? I don't know why this round was different...). Anyway, they told her she would have to do out-patient chemo with a different drug (one that she has done in-patient before) starting last Thursday I believe. But then she got a call that she had to go to the hospital to get a brand new chemo drug (don't know if it's brand new to the world, but its one that she hasn't gotten before) to see if it can get rid of the leukemia long enough to get her transplant. I'm not sure of the time line at the moment, but she did go back to the hospital today.
Please, please, please, keep her in your thoughts. Please?
Anyway, I stayed home from work today and slept and took pills and drank water and tea like crazy. I planned on going back to work tomorrow but it'll depend on the level of pain in my head and throat. I'm sure I caught this crap because my coworkers find it necessary to go to work sick to prove their loyalty or something and I just don't see it that way. STAY HOME WHEN YOU ARE SICK.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Skype
Holy cow. I know I'm super late on the Skype bandwagon but this thing is AWESOME!
See, my husband's best friend is Doug (he has two blogs, Ramblings and Fitness). Doug moved away to Hawaii a few years ago, married an AMAZING woman named Angela (also two blogs, here and here), and works as a fourth grade teacher. He's also a budding triathlete.
Shameless Plug: Donate to Doug! Details HERE. You want a recommendation? This guy is awesome and he's trying to start his triathlon career on a teacher's salary in Hawaii. Any amount will help him register for races and buy proper equipment. He also posts daily about his training and his races. Makes me almost feel guilty about eating ice cream while attempting to write one post per month.
Anyway, back to the real reason for this post. We both have webcams and had made a plan to chat online from time to time. I can tell how much my husband misses this guy because occasionally he'll make a joke that I don't understand even though he's laughing uncontrollably. It is then that I ask him, "Hunny, you miss Doug, don't you?". After several months of talking about chatting we FINALLY synchronized our watches and got the chance to see each other face to face. From thousands of miles away.
And. It. Was. Awesome.
Doug and Angela - so glad to have you two in our lives, and we miss you. Aloha!
See, my husband's best friend is Doug (he has two blogs, Ramblings and Fitness). Doug moved away to Hawaii a few years ago, married an AMAZING woman named Angela (also two blogs, here and here), and works as a fourth grade teacher. He's also a budding triathlete.
Shameless Plug: Donate to Doug! Details HERE. You want a recommendation? This guy is awesome and he's trying to start his triathlon career on a teacher's salary in Hawaii. Any amount will help him register for races and buy proper equipment. He also posts daily about his training and his races. Makes me almost feel guilty about eating ice cream while attempting to write one post per month.
Anyway, back to the real reason for this post. We both have webcams and had made a plan to chat online from time to time. I can tell how much my husband misses this guy because occasionally he'll make a joke that I don't understand even though he's laughing uncontrollably. It is then that I ask him, "Hunny, you miss Doug, don't you?". After several months of talking about chatting we FINALLY synchronized our watches and got the chance to see each other face to face. From thousands of miles away.
And. It. Was. Awesome.
Doug and Angela - so glad to have you two in our lives, and we miss you. Aloha!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Randomness
In hopes to get over my blog block (similar to writer's block, but I'm not a writer), I figured I could throw out a few random things that have been happening lately.
- I cleaned a little this weekend. I had quite a few boxes in the living room that were taking up space and really needed to be organized, and I guess I finally got tired of looking at them. There are still boxes here and most of the stuff in the boxes I went through has simply been distributed around the house, but I feel a lot better about it.
- My mom was in really good spirits tonight. She's been in good spirits for a while but I feel like it was especially good tonight. She's home, still having a rough time, and she has to go back to the hospital soon, but she so strong it's crazy.
- I think I've taken out my camera twice in the last month? How sad is that? I really haven't had the time. Or the desire. Or any gigs because I told all of my word-of-mouth people that I was taking a break. It bums me out but I really needed to let it go for a little while - it just became too much to deal with. I hate to admit it, but I might not be able to pick it up again until Mom is well. And she WILL get well.
- I bought two pairs of shoes today, thanks to my mom's awesome birthday gift and some cash that I had gotten for Christmas/birthday. They're both walking shoes so I'm excited to get back into walking every night. I'm no triathlete or anything, but walking is good for me ;-)
- This was a pretty good three day weekend. But I need more. And more and more and more. Ugh.
- Netflix instant streaming video is AWESOME. Paired with my iPad it's the best way to spend time on a treadmill. I need to keep track of my workouts better, now that I'm trying to be more consistent again.
- I got three letters from my soldier who recently returned to Afghanistan. He wrote them over a two week span and mailed them separately but they all showed up on the same day. Crazy! I'm so lucky to have a soldier who has time to write back. I need to write him more often though.
- I went all last week without crying. SUCCESS
- I'm going to call an eye doctor this week. This double vision thing while reading is really getting annoying and I would like to avoid my 2:30pm headache. I will likely come out of that appointment with glasses. Yay.
I think that's about it. Maybe that gave you a small update? My mind, my environment, and my emotions are a total mess. Forgive the randomness, please.
- I cleaned a little this weekend. I had quite a few boxes in the living room that were taking up space and really needed to be organized, and I guess I finally got tired of looking at them. There are still boxes here and most of the stuff in the boxes I went through has simply been distributed around the house, but I feel a lot better about it.
- My mom was in really good spirits tonight. She's been in good spirits for a while but I feel like it was especially good tonight. She's home, still having a rough time, and she has to go back to the hospital soon, but she so strong it's crazy.
- I think I've taken out my camera twice in the last month? How sad is that? I really haven't had the time. Or the desire. Or any gigs because I told all of my word-of-mouth people that I was taking a break. It bums me out but I really needed to let it go for a little while - it just became too much to deal with. I hate to admit it, but I might not be able to pick it up again until Mom is well. And she WILL get well.
- I bought two pairs of shoes today, thanks to my mom's awesome birthday gift and some cash that I had gotten for Christmas/birthday. They're both walking shoes so I'm excited to get back into walking every night. I'm no triathlete or anything, but walking is good for me ;-)
- This was a pretty good three day weekend. But I need more. And more and more and more. Ugh.
- Netflix instant streaming video is AWESOME. Paired with my iPad it's the best way to spend time on a treadmill. I need to keep track of my workouts better, now that I'm trying to be more consistent again.
- I got three letters from my soldier who recently returned to Afghanistan. He wrote them over a two week span and mailed them separately but they all showed up on the same day. Crazy! I'm so lucky to have a soldier who has time to write back. I need to write him more often though.
- I went all last week without crying. SUCCESS
- I'm going to call an eye doctor this week. This double vision thing while reading is really getting annoying and I would like to avoid my 2:30pm headache. I will likely come out of that appointment with glasses. Yay.
I think that's about it. Maybe that gave you a small update? My mind, my environment, and my emotions are a total mess. Forgive the randomness, please.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
So much to be thankful for
As you might have read in my last post, the week between Christmas and New Years was particularly... busy. While writing that post I was having a hard time focusing on the positive things that happened and chose to focus on the negative. Honestly, it was a rough week for me, but I'd like to talk about the great things that happened this last week.
-- I got to see my mom, dad, and brother for Christmas! I was really worried when I started to feel sick but we had a lot of fun and as always Matt and my brother got to bond.
-- My parents got me an AMAZING new photo scanner. I've taken on the task of scanning all the photos in my grandma's house. Let's just say she was not only an avid photographer, she also kept every photo she ever took. That's a lot of photos to scan, crop, label, and assign to a family member. Now I have an even better piece of equipment to do it!
-- Matt and I exchanged stockings just before Christmas and HOLY COW does my husband know me well! There was not one thing in the whole stocking that I didn't flip over. Amazing creativity and know-how by this wonderful man of mine.
-- My brother is probably the most creative person I know, and that is saying something. He wrapped my gift (Maggie Griffin's book Tip It) to be a stand up photo frame. Genius.
-- He wrapped Matt's present (an iTunes giftcard) in cardboard and thenseveral many many many layers of duct tape. It probably took him a good 10 hilarious minutes to get the card out. Awesome!
-- While I was home sick Matt took great care of me. Seriously, what a guy I have here.
-- Since my mom had to go to the hospital and therefore my grandma didn't visit for New Years, I got to spend a lot of time with my boys. I do miss them, it was nice to hang out when they weren't running around with their own things to do.
-- I BOUGHT A CAR!!!!!!!
I'm seriously stressing about going back to work, I don't feel rested at all, but I sure do have plenty to be thankful for. Thank you to all of you who have been such a big part of my life!
-- I got to see my mom, dad, and brother for Christmas! I was really worried when I started to feel sick but we had a lot of fun and as always Matt and my brother got to bond.
-- My parents got me an AMAZING new photo scanner. I've taken on the task of scanning all the photos in my grandma's house. Let's just say she was not only an avid photographer, she also kept every photo she ever took. That's a lot of photos to scan, crop, label, and assign to a family member. Now I have an even better piece of equipment to do it!
-- Matt and I exchanged stockings just before Christmas and HOLY COW does my husband know me well! There was not one thing in the whole stocking that I didn't flip over. Amazing creativity and know-how by this wonderful man of mine.
-- My brother is probably the most creative person I know, and that is saying something. He wrapped my gift (Maggie Griffin's book Tip It) to be a stand up photo frame. Genius.
-- He wrapped Matt's present (an iTunes giftcard) in cardboard and then
-- While I was home sick Matt took great care of me. Seriously, what a guy I have here.
-- Since my mom had to go to the hospital and therefore my grandma didn't visit for New Years, I got to spend a lot of time with my boys. I do miss them, it was nice to hang out when they weren't running around with their own things to do.
-- I BOUGHT A CAR!!!!!!!
I'm seriously stressing about going back to work, I don't feel rested at all, but I sure do have plenty to be thankful for. Thank you to all of you who have been such a big part of my life!
Saturday, January 1, 2011
My Christmas Vacation
If I told a stranger about the last week of my life, they would think that I'm bat shit crazy or making stuff up. Luckily, you all know me better. I want to remember this week, which is why I'm writing about it now, but feel free to skip this post as I have no idea how long it will end up.
First: my mom. My mom is probably the strongest person I know. I have no idea how she is managing to deal with the pain, discomfort, and invasion of privacy that comes with being sick with cancer. She is consistently upbeat and striving to move forward with her treatment and her life. She is my rock and I will never forget the strength she has shown in the last year. Monday, December 27, 2010 she got a call from the UCSF hospital where she has been receiving treatment (most recently out-patient chemo... 10 days of chemo, 14 days of rest). Her blood cell counts (specifically her red and white blood cells I believe) were just too low. The outpatient chemo had done its job and killed the leukemia, but it also kills her good cells and they were going back up too slowly. The leukemia, however, was returning quickly so the doctors had to act. While I feel that outpatient chemo was the ideal solution to mom's need to be independent, inpatient chemo had begin again. She went back to her dreaded room in the UCSF hemotology wing facing a freaking hill with no cell reception on Tuesday, December 28th and started chemo the next day. She is very very tired and it's going to get rougher, but she's in good spirits. She definitely appreciates the well wishes so please keep sending those her way!
In slightly related news, I caught a nasty cold this break. The only person who was ill was Matt's grandma whom we saw on Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning, but my symptoms didn't start until probably Sunday night when I got a sore throat. I washed my hands a thousand times in hopes to keep my mom from the cold, and in retrospect I shouldn't have been around her at all. I just couldn't bare the thought of not spending Christmas with her. I attempted to spend the week getting better - lots of tea, water and gatorade, resting on the couch in yoga pants watching TV and movies for hours on end. However, my mom spiked a fever just after getting to the hospital and the nurses were very strict about who was able to come see her. Even though I'm at the tail end of the cold, there was no way they were letting me in with my cough this weekend either. I'm so very grateful that I was able to spend some time with my mom at Christmas (though I'm furious with myself for not getting any photos of her - hopefully she'll let me take some next time she's home), and it kills me to not have seen her at new years, but hopefully the nice doctors at Urgent Care will be able to help me out tomorrow so I can see her next weekend.
Another piece of news about my Christmas break is about my Uncle Greg (dad's older brother). He had suffered from a stroke some years ago and ever since then has had trouble remembering names, dates and places - basically his short term memory. He had been doing pretty well until this last week when he was believed to have had another stroke. After some testing and now two hospitalizations, it sounds like he hit his head and had a brain injury that was causing a lot of fluid to build up around his brain. After a surgery and draining of the fluid, he got better, then seemingly worse to the point where he was becoming agitated and scratching his face but would not open his eyes or speak, to suddenly being better again. It was hard getting this information so far removed from the actual source, but it sounds like he is doing much much better now. It sucked to hear the panic in my dad's voice when he realized his wife and his brother were both in the hospital though.
And finally to my dad. A little back story: my dad was in a motorcycle accident when he was a junior in high school. Someone was turning left and someone was going straight and it ended up with my dad being hit by a drunk driver and his femur being broken. I need to find a picture of him in the hospital with the cast to give you a visual, but basically dad stopped riding motorcycles and instead had a metal rod inserted into his leg to heal his femur. Anyway, every since then his hip has bothered him more and more as the weather got colder or when he had a long day of walking - some calcium deposits had formed on the head of the metal rod that was rubbing on the inside of his hip. Very painful. He's been getting some cortizone shots every now and again when the pain became intolerable, but he's been in a lot of pain lately and went to see his doctor about it. He had been considering removing the metal rod as his leg has obviously healed after all these years and it was now causing him pain, but he didn't want to have surgery while mom was still in and out of the hospital. After an x-ray last week, his doctors realized that he actually has a mild case of scoliosis and bones in his lower back were tilted to the point where it might be sitting on his sciatic nerve which would certainly explain the pain. They're going to have to do an MRI to be sure, which should be done in the next week, but treatment for this might include several epidural infusions. Of what, I'm not sure, but frequent epidurals can't be good for you either.
I'm scared.
2009 was not fun with mom having back surgery the same month my grandmother died. I hoped that 2010 would be a better year but it seems all it brought was more pain and illness with me getting sick with what seemed to be a cold and ending up with a cough lasting 8 weeks to my mom being diagnosed with leukemia just before heading to Hawaii for Doug's wedding (which made the trip a little less fun) to my grandpa passing in September and then my dad's back and hip getting worse than I've ever seen. 2011 - don't suck.
I do have one good piece of news though. While not as impulsive as it felt, it sure kept the excitement going. I BOUGHT A CAR! Matt and I had been talking about how having two trucks really wasn't as practical as it once was and that we should consider getting something a little smaller. Matt happened to take a look at my favorite Ford dealership's website and found this black beauty - a 2008 Ford Edge. Two rows of seats, lots of space in the back for a dog or luggage or whatever, black exterior with black leather interior and a beautiful vista roof. I had a bad experience (I had... a bad... experience - name that movie!) with a sunroof on my first car - the Saturn Hooptie - I opened it on the way to a dance at school and of course it wouldn't close once we got there and it was supposed to rain! *end sidenote* Anyway, the car will get slightly better gas mileage, Matt and I fit in it perfectly, and I have the seal of approval from my mom, my dad, and my brother. The car actually resembles my mom's Acura MDX pretty well but I am just in love with this car. I drove around Dublin quite a bit while I had the chance and I plan on driving more in the near future to get used to it. Thankfully we got a great trade-in price on my truck and my buddy at the dealership really took care of every detail. Anyway, here she is!
I think that's enough for one post, don't you? Happy New Years everyone! Hope you all had a wonderful holiday season!
First: my mom. My mom is probably the strongest person I know. I have no idea how she is managing to deal with the pain, discomfort, and invasion of privacy that comes with being sick with cancer. She is consistently upbeat and striving to move forward with her treatment and her life. She is my rock and I will never forget the strength she has shown in the last year. Monday, December 27, 2010 she got a call from the UCSF hospital where she has been receiving treatment (most recently out-patient chemo... 10 days of chemo, 14 days of rest). Her blood cell counts (specifically her red and white blood cells I believe) were just too low. The outpatient chemo had done its job and killed the leukemia, but it also kills her good cells and they were going back up too slowly. The leukemia, however, was returning quickly so the doctors had to act. While I feel that outpatient chemo was the ideal solution to mom's need to be independent, inpatient chemo had begin again. She went back to her dreaded room in the UCSF hemotology wing facing a freaking hill with no cell reception on Tuesday, December 28th and started chemo the next day. She is very very tired and it's going to get rougher, but she's in good spirits. She definitely appreciates the well wishes so please keep sending those her way!
In slightly related news, I caught a nasty cold this break. The only person who was ill was Matt's grandma whom we saw on Christmas Eve and Christmas Morning, but my symptoms didn't start until probably Sunday night when I got a sore throat. I washed my hands a thousand times in hopes to keep my mom from the cold, and in retrospect I shouldn't have been around her at all. I just couldn't bare the thought of not spending Christmas with her. I attempted to spend the week getting better - lots of tea, water and gatorade, resting on the couch in yoga pants watching TV and movies for hours on end. However, my mom spiked a fever just after getting to the hospital and the nurses were very strict about who was able to come see her. Even though I'm at the tail end of the cold, there was no way they were letting me in with my cough this weekend either. I'm so very grateful that I was able to spend some time with my mom at Christmas (though I'm furious with myself for not getting any photos of her - hopefully she'll let me take some next time she's home), and it kills me to not have seen her at new years, but hopefully the nice doctors at Urgent Care will be able to help me out tomorrow so I can see her next weekend.
Another piece of news about my Christmas break is about my Uncle Greg (dad's older brother). He had suffered from a stroke some years ago and ever since then has had trouble remembering names, dates and places - basically his short term memory. He had been doing pretty well until this last week when he was believed to have had another stroke. After some testing and now two hospitalizations, it sounds like he hit his head and had a brain injury that was causing a lot of fluid to build up around his brain. After a surgery and draining of the fluid, he got better, then seemingly worse to the point where he was becoming agitated and scratching his face but would not open his eyes or speak, to suddenly being better again. It was hard getting this information so far removed from the actual source, but it sounds like he is doing much much better now. It sucked to hear the panic in my dad's voice when he realized his wife and his brother were both in the hospital though.
And finally to my dad. A little back story: my dad was in a motorcycle accident when he was a junior in high school. Someone was turning left and someone was going straight and it ended up with my dad being hit by a drunk driver and his femur being broken. I need to find a picture of him in the hospital with the cast to give you a visual, but basically dad stopped riding motorcycles and instead had a metal rod inserted into his leg to heal his femur. Anyway, every since then his hip has bothered him more and more as the weather got colder or when he had a long day of walking - some calcium deposits had formed on the head of the metal rod that was rubbing on the inside of his hip. Very painful. He's been getting some cortizone shots every now and again when the pain became intolerable, but he's been in a lot of pain lately and went to see his doctor about it. He had been considering removing the metal rod as his leg has obviously healed after all these years and it was now causing him pain, but he didn't want to have surgery while mom was still in and out of the hospital. After an x-ray last week, his doctors realized that he actually has a mild case of scoliosis and bones in his lower back were tilted to the point where it might be sitting on his sciatic nerve which would certainly explain the pain. They're going to have to do an MRI to be sure, which should be done in the next week, but treatment for this might include several epidural infusions. Of what, I'm not sure, but frequent epidurals can't be good for you either.
I'm scared.
2009 was not fun with mom having back surgery the same month my grandmother died. I hoped that 2010 would be a better year but it seems all it brought was more pain and illness with me getting sick with what seemed to be a cold and ending up with a cough lasting 8 weeks to my mom being diagnosed with leukemia just before heading to Hawaii for Doug's wedding (which made the trip a little less fun) to my grandpa passing in September and then my dad's back and hip getting worse than I've ever seen. 2011 - don't suck.
I do have one good piece of news though. While not as impulsive as it felt, it sure kept the excitement going. I BOUGHT A CAR! Matt and I had been talking about how having two trucks really wasn't as practical as it once was and that we should consider getting something a little smaller. Matt happened to take a look at my favorite Ford dealership's website and found this black beauty - a 2008 Ford Edge. Two rows of seats, lots of space in the back for a dog or luggage or whatever, black exterior with black leather interior and a beautiful vista roof. I had a bad experience (I had... a bad... experience - name that movie!) with a sunroof on my first car - the Saturn Hooptie - I opened it on the way to a dance at school and of course it wouldn't close once we got there and it was supposed to rain! *end sidenote* Anyway, the car will get slightly better gas mileage, Matt and I fit in it perfectly, and I have the seal of approval from my mom, my dad, and my brother. The car actually resembles my mom's Acura MDX pretty well but I am just in love with this car. I drove around Dublin quite a bit while I had the chance and I plan on driving more in the near future to get used to it. Thankfully we got a great trade-in price on my truck and my buddy at the dealership really took care of every detail. Anyway, here she is!
I think that's enough for one post, don't you? Happy New Years everyone! Hope you all had a wonderful holiday season!
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